HGotW: Bret Stephens

Like many Never Trump Republicans, he has notes, and a very shitty take. Why does he get a huge paycheck from the Times again?

Bedbug

The Gray Lady has a stable of Conservative opinion writers, ostensibly to provide “balance” to their editorial board. Some of them are tolerable. For instance, I can read David French without reflexive abhorrence, although his Evangelism really grates on me, and his victory lap when Dobbs came down really pissed me off.

But today, I have to talk about Bret “bedbug¹” Stephens, and his latest anal leakage on the OpEd pages, where he challenges Biden to do the “honorable” thing by stepping aside. Titled “The Most Courageous Thing that Joe Biden Can Do”, it is his pitch that Biden needs to step aside for another candidate to swoop in and bend their epee to squash the Tangerine Twatwaffle in the general election.

He starts with a paean to Saint Ronnie:

In 1977, Ronald Reagan shared his thoughts on the Cold War with his aide Richard Allen. “My idea of American policy toward the Soviet Union is simple, and some would say simplistic,” the future president said. “It is this: We win, and they lose. What do you think of that?”

This year, Joe Biden cast the purpose of his presidency as a struggle against authoritarianism, at home and abroad. What’s his theory of victory?

You are not going to be surprised that he is certain that Biden is just “managing” the situation.

He doesn’t appear to have one. His style of governance is to manage threats, not defeat them. He has sought to provide Ukraine with sufficient weaponry not to lose to Vladimir Putin. But even before congressional Republicans forced a spending hiatus, he was reluctant to give Ukraine the types or numbers of weapons it needed to evict Russian forces from its territory. He believes Israel has a right to protect itself. But his previous insistence that Hamas has to be defeated has given way to a U.S.-backed cease-fire resolution that effectively ensures Hamas’s survival.

Of course, like many people (and virtually all self-identified conservatives) get a giant chubby when they recall Ron Reagan’s era, where he really was a fucking horrible human being, who really exploded the national debt in his chasing of the dragon to end the great Red threat, and who surrounded himself with sketchy as fuck people who did some really bad things.

But apart from that Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play.

He goes on to point out issues he has, rolling through Israel/Hamas where he finds fault that he isn’t piling on with Bibi in their approach to scrape the Gaza strip before they rebuild it into a garden destination for tourists, and that we aren’t airdropping mega-tons of armaments and cash into Ukraine.

And a lot more nits he has.

But, don’t despair, he has a recommendation!

And it won’t be finding a way to offload Kamala Harris from the ticket, easing the apprehension many voters have about a feeble president being succeeded by his unpopular and unconvincing vice president. Pushing out the first Black female vice president would alienate a lot of Democratic voters.

Herein, he recognizes that just replacing his bugaboo on the ticket, Kamala Harris, will not fix it. No, instead, Biden needs to step aside to make way for … who again?

It all leaves the president with one option that can be a win for America and, ultimately, his place in history. He can still choose not to run, to cede the field to a Democrat who can win — paging Josh Shapiro or Gretchen Whitmer — and do the hard and brave things it will take to secure security and peace for the free world.

There’s still time, if only just. It would be a courageous, honorable and transformative legacy.

So, let me get this straight. Bret believes that it would probably be bad optics to dump Harris as Veep, but if Biden does the “courageous” thing and bows out, that his wet-dream candidate of either Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro, or Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer will be selected in floor votes at the convention or some shit.

Uh, bro, if Biden steps aside, Harris will be the nominee. And should she also do the selfless thing and demur, you ain’t getting either Whitmer or Shapiro. You know what Democrat has a national profile, and a central casting perfect look?

If you guessed Gavin Newsom, give yourself a gold star. And while I live in California, and I think Newsom works here, but he would get filleted in a national race, even against the tangerine rhino.

Bret’s fantastic scenario is a common one that I hear in the “Never Trump” former-Republican ecosystem. They all have a favorite Democrat that they can “tolerate”, but the reality is that should Biden be unable to run, Kamala Harris will be atop the ticket, and she “might” choose one of those pet Dems the NT cohort goes gaga over, she is just as likely to pick fellow Californian pol, Newsom.

For this shit take, Bret-bug Stephens earns my “Human Garbage of the Week” award

Honorable Mention - David French

Apparently, the NY Times columnist and evangelical representative — David French — got “cancelled” by his church. I mean who would have thought that a sect of the Presbyterian church that broke off in response to their desire to not have to segregate with black people are intolerant to French and his adoption of a child from Ethiopia.

I mean, this was a total shock. Anyhow, here’s the gifted link: The Day My Old Church Canceled Me Was a Very Sad Day. How mean they were to him. If you do look at the article, be sure to read some of the delish that is in the comments. Lots of schadenfreude to feed the ego.

1. Political writer David Karpf made the comparison of Bret Stephens to an infestation of bedbugs, and of course Bret took offense and tried to use his perch on the editorial staff at the NY Times to get Karpf fired. Classic “cancelling” that conservatives approve of. Bret Stephens’s “bedbug” meltdown, explained - Vox

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