Master of Schlock: Roger Corman

As I revel in his unique talents, and his extensive catalog, he really makes me smile. Today I review Starcrash, an absurd post Star Wars movie that follows the formula, but cheaper.

I wish I had bookmarked it, but I read a quip about filmmaker Roger Corman that went like this(paraphrase):

A longstanding joke in Hollywood was that Corman could negotiate the production of a film on a pay phone, finance it with the money left in the change slot and then shoot the whole film in the phone booth.

Lately, I have been watching some really crappy movies. B-Movies from the 1950’s and 60’s, are the best, and in my journey I have found more than a few that were directed by, produced by, or influenced in some manner by Roger Corman. Roger Corman, born in 1926, and passing away just this year (May 9, 2024) was rather prolific in his work, with over 500 titles to his credit in a variety of roles.

The first movies by him that I “found” were RiffTrax titles like She Devils, and others. At first, I didn't connect the dots, but a savvy reader clued me in.

Since then, I have started hunting them down.

There are lists of cult classics, and I have been buying copies of them.

Forbidden World, Star Crash, Humanoids from the Deep were all recommended as “Must Haves”, so they are in my collection. I already had a few, Last Woman on Earth, Wasp Woman, Attack of the Giant Leeches, and the fine fine film She Gods of Shark Reef.

This is all just craptastic Schlock.

But then I added a few more, The Texas Dynamite Chase - another exemplar. There are a few more that will arrive used from E-Bay over the next couple of weeks.

Oh, and while I was at it, there is a new print of Cherry 2000, a seminal quasi sci-fi flick that introduced me to Melanie Griffith, is on its way too.

First up: Starcrash

Last night, my wife was out with a friend, so I spooled up Starcrash. Released in 1978, the biggest name associated with it was Christopher Plummer, and the main character was Caroline Munro (not bad eye candy¹).

I mean, she’s piloting a ship through hyperspace and wearing that…

I should point out that Star Wars was a turning point in the genre of SciFi, where it went from static, to more operatic with effects tossed in to drive audience interest.

Starcrash is the latter, and the dialog is just dripping with Velveeta² and oozing with sleeze.

How do you know it is sleeze?

I know you are thinking “yeah Sweaty, c’mon fam, share it”

Ok, well, in this space opera the emperor is played by Chris Plummer. And the whole movie is predicated on this mission to find a missing planet or some such shit. Apparently, as in Ancient Rome, the Emperor’s son was on a similar mission but was “lost in space” and the sub-mission assigned to Caroline was to find him. (yeah, rolled my eyes so hard that I now have to follow concussion protocols)

Anyhow, they get captured, turned into slaves, escape, and then finally complete their mission, and find the Emperor’s son.

You will never guess who played the son…

Yep, that is the Hof.

Oh yeah, slather it on.

The effects were … low budget. As per the pull quote above, Roger Corman was the ultimate penny pincher, and it really shows. This 2:36 trailer below is a good amalgam of the “effects.” It ain’t no ILM, but it does all fit into the overall envelope.

I will go out on a limb and say that if you watch that trailer, you can skip the movie.

Unless you revel in the glory that is schlock. In that case, rock on my bruh!

As I watch the rest of my bounteous haul of Xmas videos, I will post further mini-reviews.

1. Ok, yeah, she’s hot, and she flounces around in a leather/latex bikini.

2. Velveeta is a registered trademark of the Kraft corporation

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Yeah, I am still trying to avoid the shitshow that is politics, so I will be writing more about music and other banal topics. I will be back, but not yet.