My Birthday is coming up...

And I have been a very very good boy. (but not that good)

Four weeks from today, I hit a milestone. I will complete my sixtieth trip ‘round Sol.

And I have been a very good boy this year. I write a lot, and I don’t charge anything for my writings (and truly, there have been a few who have emailed me saying they would pay), I think I deserve a treat.

I have my eyes on a new guitar. It is something unique. The Martin D-300 seems like something I should have on my wall…

Holee sheeeeeeit. I love this gaudy bauble.

I mean, look at that, it’s a thing of abject beauty. From the website:

The Martin D-300 is a stunning tribute to Martin Guitar’s rich legacy, craftsmanship, and the people behind it all. Inspired by the D-3 Millionth guitar, this limited-edition Dreadnought celebrates the 3 millionth serialized Martin guitar. Its solid Adirondack spruce top represents the cross-section of an American sycamore tree, featuring rings made of real sycamore and silver representing each year of the company’s growth, with solid gold dots marking pivotal moments in Martin’s 192-year history. On the back of the guitar, which is made of rare and coveted Brazilian rosewood, a beautiful sycamore tree of abalone pays tribute to the countless employees who have left their fingerprints on the company’s legacy, from its early days in New York City to its longtime home in Nazareth, Pennsylvania. The D-300 shifts the focus from the Martin family to the “& Co.” in the company’s name, acknowledging the workers who help make it all possible. The theme of “past, present, and future” is woven into every ornate detail, including an inlaid ebony pickguard with rubies marking each of Martin’s three Nazareth-area factory locations since 1839. With European flamed maple binding, gold Waverly tuning machines with Liquidmetal®¹ posts and custom brass knobs, and Liquidmetal bridge pins with bezel-set emeralds, the D-300 is both a visual and sonic masterpiece, honoring Martin’s enduring commitment to quality, artistry, and the workers who built the brand. Only 30 of these guitars are available for purchase.

So, I have 2,100 subscribers as of this morning, so that is only about $150 each to cover the $300,000 price tag².

Ok, all joking aside, this is ridiculous, but Martin seems to think that I might buy an exemplar of this 1 of 30 editions³.

1. Ok, like low oxygen copper cables and wooden knobs for your Mackintosh amplifiers that audiophiles buy and swear makes their hifi systems sound better, these Liquidmetal bridge pins are $229 woo woo purchases.

2. Seriously, do not do this, do not send me money, this is a joke.

3. That said, the $750 model 000-Junior I bought last year is a favorite to pull from the wall for a quick break in the workday.